“N.C Mission Rejects Charity Over Turban ” read the title of a November 21 US news article on cbsnews.com.

Wait…what?

In short, a man and his wife were asked to leave a mission in North Carolina after he refused to remove his turban–which is required by the Sikh faith–before entering the building. They wanted to see where their annual donations were going and decided to visit the mission. The building has a large sign that outlines the mission’s policy regarding headwear. The in-take director and executive director of the facility said that the man became argumentative after being asked to remove his turban; he was then asked to leave.

An Associated Press article posted on December 17 is titled: “GA judge jails Muslim woman over head scarf .”

Hold on…back up.

A Muslim woman who refused to remove her head scarf at a court security checkpoint was sentenced to serve 10 days in jail by a local judge. The judge said she violated a court policy that prohibits people from wearing headgear in court. The woman was freed unexpectedly following the involvement of Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR).

You haven’t heard anything yet: “Sikh family accuses deputies of abuse, taunts ” was the title of a December 5 article in the Houston Chronicle.

A Sikh family returns home to find that their house has been robbed. Like any other human being, they called the police, hoping they would document the scene, track down the perpetrator, and receive some piece of mind. Upon arriving at the residence, the deputy became hostile and inquisitive and asked for IDs from the family members. After noticing that one of the family members was carrying a Kirpan, a small ceremonial knife mandated by the Sikh faith, he “freaked out.” The confusion multiplied when the deputy pointed a taser to the woman and started handcuffing other family members, even holding one of them in the back of the sheriff’s car. More deputies arrived, but none investigated the robbery, until a supervisor arrived and ordered the deputies to release the family members.

These incidences are maddening. I remember growing up in school, and wondering why kids were able to miss class because of religious observances when I didn’t have any of my own. I realized that it was part of the community and we should respect that. Reading these articles hints at the intolerance possessed by too many individuals in this society.

In a country that witnesses people getting up early on Sunday mornings and wearing their best outfits to church for the sake of adhering to and respecting their faith; that considers Christmas a national holiday where nearly every establishment is closed; that has Easter sale specials painted on every TV ad and newspaper, you’d think that we would be fine with turbans, head scarves, and ceremonial knives for religions that do not have a national holiday or special deals. Especially with the peak of the holiday season next week, I urge everyone to go beyond tolerance and exercise a higher sense of understanding

Study after study states that Asian Americans maintain a higher stress level compared to other groups. However, it seems that this holiday season brings stress to everyone. The American Psychological Association (APA) issued a press release Thursday regarding a new poll that found more than 8 out of 10 people anticipate a stressful holiday season. This poll also found that the economic crisis is impacting women and families the most. What were these sources of stress? In order, they were money (82%), the economy (82%), and work (69%).

Women are more likely than men to worry about having enough money to purchase gifts. About a quarter of the respondents are feeling pressure to purchase gifts. In households with children, these stressors are even more likely.

With the economy in shambles, it seems like folks are having a real love-hate relationship with the holidays. But as APA’s executive director for professional practice states, “It is important to put things in perspective and realize that materialism is not the focus of your holiday.” The press release goes onto provide some ideas to prevent stress, such as taking time for yourself, volunteering and creating realistic expectations.

These ideas shouldn’t be practiced just during a straining holiday season, but throughout the year as well. The number-one suggestion was to take time for yourself. I can’t say how many times you hear that from mentors as an undergraduate: take time for yourself. Often, as involved, young adults, we want to be like the Energizer bunny (machines even!) and turn out product after product, and show up at event after event while living, breathing and drinking caffeine.

My question to you is: how can you change the world if you can’t take care of yourself? How can you prioritize other important issues if you don’t prioritize yourself?

Your work is important, but realize that your work can’t be done if you are keeling over in pain from not eating in the last 10 hours or dozing off at the wheel because you haven’t slept in days. Lead by example, practice what you preach, or pick your own cliché to follow. Bottom line, give a gift to yourself this season: time.

The other day, while perusing AngryAsianMan.com, I found a Web site called yellowfeverclothing.com. I winced at the name of that Web site. Too often do I, as an Asian American woman, hear the terms “yellow fever” or “yellow plague,” signifying a strong sexual obsession or preference for Asian women by an individual who is not Asian or Asian American. (BTW: Yellow fever is actually a severe viral disease that is often fatal.) While it may also signify an obsession with anything “Asian,” such as manga or anime, or an obsession with Asian men, these terms hit home hardest for Asian and Asian American women.

Going with my natural instinct, I decided to enter this Web site with the smallest amount of hope that this Web site was not what I assumed it to be. I was, of course, 100% correct.

This Web site is the home to dozens of grossly overpriced, dehumanizing T-shirts that not only reduce Asian women to an object but profit from stereotypical images and sexual innuendos.

Instantly, mental images and repressed emotions spewed forth into my mind, reminding me of experiences when I was objectified: walking to the local mall and someone screaming, “Me love you long time,” out of a car window; toting groceries home when a truck honks and whistles at me; feeling like I can’t wear a tank top and shorts on a 100-degree day for fear of getting mentally undressed by the individual behind the store counter; taking mail to the post office when a passing individual makes a kissy face at you. How did I react? I didn’t.

Needless to say, it surprises me that people can sleep at night knowing that the bed they sleep on was purchased with profits from products that further strips a group of individuals of their human characteristics and reduces them to sexual objects. These items go on to influence the greater public, which then affects us as individuals.

Continue reading Love You Long Time?…